horrid memory into funny memory in less than 1year (part 1)

This conversation came up during our lunch time w/ Larry, Moe, Curly, & Shemp.  We are scientist, scientist, engineer, & engineer, respectively.  I point this out because it’s amazing what kind of stupid discussion we can have, given the education level.  It goes to show you that education does not make you smarter…lol.  We are all married with two kids, except Shemp.

We decided to do some manly offroading with our trucks.  I have a Jeep Cherokee, Larry has a Toyota FJ, and Moe has a Honda Ridgeline.  Place we went is called Rausch Creek Off road park in PA.  This is the real deal, nothing but sea of lifted rock crawlers and jeeps.  Everybody had fun except for the Ridgeline guy.  We had to winch him out of the park.  He damaged his transmission for sure.  Thick smell of roasted transmission oil was a sure sign it needed overhauling. 

Once we got out, we were all pleased with our capable 4x4s, minus Moe.  We operate in a buddy system.  Larry and I barraged Moe with reasons and justifications why he NEEDS to get a different vehicle, a real truck, a man’s truck!  This kind of pressuring by close friends worked! He found enough strength and bravery to face his wife.  Before I continue further, I need to fill you in on his wife.  She is a mean, large, and in charge.  Whatever she says goes, there are no if/and/buts.  If she wants a rabbit, you pick one up by next day.  If she wants a bird, you pick up the complete kit.  If she wants a dog, you pay whatever it costs to get the one that she wants.  If she wants a cat, you say yes ma’am and shut up.  Moe doesn’t have anything left for a backbone, it’s just cartilage. 

Being good friends we are, we told him to stand up to his wife and demand that he be allowed to have some adventure time with us.  Moe is only allowed to come out if his wife okays it.  It gets really freakin annoying to plan anything around his schedule because of “it”.  So we really pumped him up to stand up to his wife, we coached him, and we did some dry-runs of all the different scenarios of the argument. 

We practiced for about a week and it was finally time.  Larry and I were on standby all evening, just in case if something goes wrong.  Moe would be welcome to stay at my house or Larry’s house for however long. 

We finally received an email at 11pm!!! He had the green light to purchase a beater Jeep!  I did reply-all, “Oh, HELL YEAH!”  Larry replied something that wasn’t politically correct, but we were all so happy for Moe.  His “backbone” was finally strengthening!

Our next day consisted of heavy strategizing of the purchase.  We said the purchase has to happen ASAP, before she changes her mind.  Three of us hit Craigslist and EBay really hard.  Found a beater Jeep for $3000usd and we all went to check it out.  It was a great truck, Larry and I gave it four thumbs up.  Moe paid for and you can tell he was beaming.  Not only was this a capable 4×4, it was a trophy, trophy of conquering his fear and adversity.  That made all of us proud of him.  He is such a great guy and he should be able to reward himself once in a while like this.  I volunteered my time to get it fixed up to pass state inspection.  After about 2weeks of repair, the truck was finally ready.  We held a team meeting and we all agreed to hit the 4×4 park for upcoming Saturday, we were set….so we thought…

Moe’s Jeep was definitely worth $3k, but it wasn’t perfect, it was actually next solar system over from being perfect.  Moe decided to celebrate this joyous occasion by driving it around with his two young girls, ages 5 and 7.  They are such adorable little kids, and their daddy loves them to death!  It was a beautiful day, Jeep is driving great, and his girls are having a blast in the back seat. 

Things suddenly turned for the worst when Moe decided to drive his beater Jeep through a mechanical car wash.  I don’t know if you’ve ever been through one, but it’s the kind with 3 giant mechanical rollers; two on either sides and one huge one on the top….Moe’s Jeep is a RAGTOP (made of cloth), a very very very old ragtop 😦

Water started pouring in as some of the smaller holes turned into bigger holes, and the spinning of the rotating machine banging against a cloth cover made it sound like you are in a tornado.  Two girls are screaming in the back, & Moe is screaming in the front.  Moe tries to start the car but it sputters to a stop, he can’t get it started.  In his last ditch effort to save his daughters, he threw himself to the back seat and covered up his two girls.  He feared the roof was going to collapse and kill his girls.

Good news is they all survived, but the ragtop was no longer a top, it was just a rag.    His last email to us was, “I am so fucked”.  Larry and I were frantic; we tried calling him, texting, & email, but no response.    Larry and I were feeling so guilty.  If it weren’t for us, Moe and his girls would have been fine.  One can only guess what kind of wrath he was dealing with.  His girls poured their heart out to their mommy and pretty much ratted him out.  No one knows what happened next inside Moe’s house…  I just know whatever backbone Moe had it just turned into string cheese.  Larry and I were very scared for him.

We finally got email back from Moe saying he can’t join us for the next 4×4 adventure, and that he is selling his Jeep.  He didn’t join us for lunch during that whole month, and he ended up giving the Jeep away for $1500. 

It’s been almost a year since the fallout, and it looks like everything is back to normal.  Moe has paid his “prison sentence” and is able to breathe fresh air again.  We talk about this incident once in a while, and we just start cracking up and it always ends with, “What the hell were you thinking, man?”…ROFL!